from https://nypost.com/2025/07/25/science/possibly-hostile-alien-threat-detected-in-unknown-interstellar-object-study/
Of course, there’s a selection effect in play. Studies that say it’s just a lump of dirty ice have much, much lower probability of being reported by NYP.
Anyway, we have now learned what it actually is.
Transcript:
Rat: — Our astronomers have detected a strange object moving towards Earth at a great speed. Rat: — Some think it might be hostile. Alien: — Nothing to worry about, it’s a shuttle from the «Galactoflix» studio. Alien: — They’re racing to get the latest episodes of «Epstein X-Files», a soap opera now popular across the whole galaxy.
Spoiler Alert: Musk sent them to Mars, Musk & Trump have bro-vorce, Musk tries to go back and retrieve the goods when - whoopsie - rocket, along with Musk, go "Boom," Trump shrugs, plausible deniability, case closed. The End.
Hey green guys, maybe *you* can find them - along with those 30,000 emails? Oh, sorry to hear about your impending suicide.
sure enough if there are other civilizations watching, we will be the laughing stock. Very little in foreign press, because all of them have their own Epstein episodes.
Spoiler Alert: Musk sent them to Mars, Musk & Trump have bro-vorce, Musk tries to go back and retrieve the goods when - whoopsie - rocket, along with Musk, go "Boom," Trump shrugs, plausible deniability, case closed. The End.
Hey green guys, maybe *you* can find them - along with those 30,000 emails? Oh, sorry to hear about your impending suicide.
sure enough if there are other civilizations watching, we will be the laughing stock. Very little in foreign press, because all of them have their own Epstein episodes.